When I think about 2020 and all that we have experienced and still experiencing collectively and individually, there are so many feels, words, emotions, adjectives. It's this ongoing story - the eventual sum of all events and moments that is telling a story that only God knows the beginning from the end, the details and simultaneously working it all together for good. I am confident that He is not caught by surprise. God is in control and sovereign. He indeed is orchestrating all things. It's in his hands. I'm in his hands.
Through a series of prompted but separate interactions throughout the day today, God keeps leading me and showing me one of the purposes for 2020. He's showing me it's been a year of awareness, becoming aware and more aware. As I look back and trace the fingerprint and footprint of the Spirit of God, I do think that is the word for me.
For all that 2020 has represented and meant thus far, it's most definitely been a time of heightened awareness on many levels and various facets. I have never been more aware of my desperate need for Jesus. I am highly aware of the power and need of prayer for all things and in all things. I am very aware of my fragility and ever so grateful and aware of God's sovereignty. I am acutely aware that I have zero control over the things that only belongs to God. I am more self aware and aware of myself. I intentionally worded it that way, it just makes more sense to me. I've been aware of my inner workings and my outer workings and how it makes me, me. Most importantly, I am intentionally becoming more aware of God's presence. I am expectantly seeking and looking for Jesus in all the ways, spaces and places. I am fully aware that I can only do what I can and that really is enough. It's been really, really good. In my awareness, there has also been a greater degree of clarify, boldness and confidence. And it's all because of the inner working of Jesus Christ and me rising up, exercising my authority and standing in His finished work.
So I'm walking in grace and new mercies. Living in and from what Jesus has purchased and paid for me. Putting on the full Armor of God. Taking one day at a time. Being intentional and deliberate in choosing peace and growing the Fruits of the Spirit. Turning off the noise and distractions. Resisting from operating, thinking and responding according to the flesh. Navigating life the best I am able to discern. Trusting God is using and working all things for my good. Praying God's will. Believing there is more. Digging deep. Pressing on. Looking for Jesus. Keeping the faith. Speaking hope. Standing on God's word.
2020 has been interesting.