Push Through

Is it just me or oftentimes after a powerful encounter with Jesus, his truth or a mountaintop experience shortly thereafter we are tested or given an opportunity to put into practice what we just learned or dispense what we received. Our natural inclination is perhaps to question the validity of our encounter, experience or revealed truth. Some may find themselves discouraged, doubtful or looking for the exit door. Why is this? I think because we are human. And life is hard, complex, complicated and tough to figure out sometimes. 

For me the frustration is probably because I think in linear terms. Everything needs, should follow a natural progression. I prefer for the things to fit neatly, nicely in a box with a bow.  But oftentimes our life including faith journey is anything but compact and predictable. It feels more like an up and down, ebb and flow, long stretches, sharp turns, quick stops, fast then slow. It feels so unpredictable and my mind craves control and certainty when everything feels so vulnerable and insecure. So my mind jumps into fight, self-preservation mode and I'm planning, overthinking, figuring out what I can do to take care of myself. So in those moments, I consciously tell myself to choose surrender and release. To remember God is in control, he is able, he is willing and he is a promise keeper. I have to choose to turn towards him and go against what my flesh is naturally bent towards - running and hiding. I choose to embrace the mystery. To grow up, not give up. 

God give me strength to choose your will and way. To remember your ways are higher, better. You see the beginning from the end and everything in between. I can push through because I am in good hands.     

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